Recently I’ve been getting a lot of questions on dates, everywhere from where to take them, on how to escalate, to finally dealing with last minute resistance (LMR).
Personally the first date is probably THE most exciting part of the entire journey, from open to close.
MY first date that was derived from cold approaches happened about a month into the journey. Becky was SOOOO into the opinion opener and the feng-shui routine that she actually invited me to her HOUSE on the spot (no exaggeration, no bs).
But being the WBAFC I was, my thought process when she asked that was: "Stage 1, step C is complete, now I need to touch her on the arm (kino) before I can proceed to the broken man routine" - remember the approach like it was yesterday.
Anyway long story short, I lasted 2 dates before she realised I was the biggest chode (basically could’ve fked her 3 times over but "didn't get the signal").
Sigh… good times… good times...
Anyway since then I’ve been lucky enough to go on a few more dates and the results have been quite different recently ; )
But it feels like quite the proportion of the population still approach the date with dread, as if it’s another chore before you finally get the goods. Putting too much focus on the destination rather than enjoying the journey.
So here is a quick guide on how to approach this arduous task.
Moron’s Guide to First Date
The first rule that beginners should get their head around is that sex is MEANT to happen. It is what happens NATURALLY between a man and woman who has any resemblance of chemistry.
Once you figure out sex is meant to happen, rather than trying to MAKE it happen, the sense of weariness will be replaced by a sense of fun and adventure.
Once you have the right mentality to let things flow naturally, there are 5 steps to the forbidden fruit.
- Appropriate Venue
- Good vibe
- Sexual energy/physical escalation
- Pull to seduction location
- Deal with LMR
Depends on your personal preference. It can be anything you find enjoyable (and she doesn’t despise). Romantic bars, picnic in the park, fancy dinner, cosy cafe, chill by the beach. Don’t reinvent the wheel, just do something you and her both enjoy is more than suffice. I would advise against movies/theatre for first date unless you are both very introverted.
Tip: Choose a location within 15 minute drive to your place, makes pulling A LOT easier.
This is probably the easiest part. Be yourself and enjoy each other’s company. Talk about anything and everything with the occasional attraction spikes. For absolute beginners, topics to talk about are:
- Each other’s hobbies
- Past - eg. school life (primary, highschool, uni), NOT ex’s
- Quirks and fun stories
Keep it fun, keep it light, keep it flirty.
For more experienced playas, the energy/feeling should be EXACTLY how a good date night feels with one of your ex-girlfriends. You are relaxed, you are not TRYING to be funny or get laid. You are just there to have a laugh, unwind from a busy week, and at the end sex comes naturally.
Also the question game is always a good fallback option if the energy is a bit flat.
NOTHING here should be forced.
Unless your goal is to try and become her best friend, the sexual vibe is very important.
If you are relaxed and feel entitled, you should be feeling aroused automatically.
Where beginners and even intermediates go wrong here is to have a CHECKLIST of things you should do, before going for say, the kiss. Rather than just being in the moment and going for it spontaneously.
What ends up happening is the guy goes through the checklist as if it’s a scientific project, and the girl can SENSE it, that you are just going through the motions. And later that night a FR (field report) appears complaining that the “techniques” don't work.
To quote the great Jeffy from RSD,
“The sole purpose of escalation should be to give YOURSELF an erection, that’s IT”.
Once you stop hiding your dick (ie your true self), everything else will fall into place.
Of course, to internalise this takes a lot of practice.
By this stage, if you are playing the game right you should both be feeling thorny and excited (remember, what you feel, they will feel). A simple “continue this at my place?” should be suffice. Although girls are always susceptible to anti-slut defense (ie they don't want to be SEEN as a slut), so a random excuse that puts it on you is always recommended. Eg. I gotta get up early so we can only have 1 drink at my place.
This is where being within a 15 minute drive REALLY helps.
This needs an article on its own, because it’s A LOT of people give up here when they’re so close to the prize.
For now just remember, it’s a man’s job to push, it’s a woman’s job to resist, so DON'T take it personally when she initially rejects your advances. Most of the time, she is KEEN and still WANTS it, but she just wants to enjoy your attention for a bit longer (and making SURE you are the alpha genes she is craving for - not some beta bitch putting up a front).
Disclaimer: a FIRM no means NO. Or if she tries to physically leave, let her. We are not advocating rape here.
“But this is the most thrilling part of the chase for the girl, so don't deny her the thrill.” - Nick Krauser, DayGame Mastery.
And if it all goes well, it should be a memorable experience for both of you. After all, not many men have the balls to do what you did on the streets.
Enjoy the fruits of your labour ; )
Remember, when she agreed to say yes, it’s a BIG commitment to take that leap of faith with a man she spent 5-15 minutes knowing on the streets. So she likes you, A LOT, because it was MUCH easier for her to say no.
You are not trying to gain her approval, you already have her captured.
Be yourself and enjoy the journey.
PS. She spent hours dolling herself up for you, she wants it to go well probably MORE so than you. So the least you can do is show her some respect by having a shower, ironing your shirt and putting on some decent cologne.1135 views